Things have not been the same with the Johnsons since losing their first son to cultism. There had been a strain in the relationship between Jerry and his wife, Jane, as they traded blames for the sad occurrence. Jerry was a mechanical engineer and more often than not, he was not always around with his family. The days he happens to be around were spent watching sports, engaging in outings and surfing the net. Jane was a trained nurse working in a government hospital.

When things went out of hands with the kids, she resigned. She had noticed a strange behaviour in Jeremy, her first son. He often kept to himself and when he was amongst his peers or siblings, he often bullied them. Jane’s concern grew as she could not handle it alone. She informed Jerry, and he told her to handle it herself since she’s the one responsible for them.

On the fateful night of Jeremy’s death, he had snuck out from the house after receiving a message that there was a fight between his cult group and their rival. As soon as he stepped out from the gate, the rival group who had been hanging around the house strangled him, leaving a note which read: “next time, don’t mess with the Blacks. See you in Hades.”

In the morning, Jerry was greeted by the corpse of his son as he set out for work. He had told his wife to handle the family altar as he was in a hurry to meet up with his business associates. Jane had broached the issue of Jeremy’s attitude that morning, but he brushed it aside, saying he would handle it when he got back. 

The Johnsons’ marriage was saved when the pastor intervened. He pointed to them that trading blames would not solve the problem, rather, resolving to right their wrongs, and putting things in the right order.

Child training is as much the responsibility of the father as it is of the mother. The error many find themselves in his believing that the mother of the home is saddled with the sole responsibility of raising the children while the man goes to win bread. This has caused gross negligence on the side of many men as they do not look into the affairs of their children.

As the father in the home, the man is answerable for the wellbeing of every member of the household because he is the priest, leader and highest authority in the home. The man has the lion share of responsibility in ensuring that the children are trained in the way of the Lord. The role of the woman is a supportive role in nurturing the children.

In ensuring the overall welfare of the children, both parents are to work together. They are not to destroy with one hand what they are building with the other. This implies that they are to be in joint agreement as to how their kids will be brought up, what form of discipline will be used in correcting erring children, what form of reward will they use to encourage good behaviour, and what have you.

They are also to watch over their own lives because their children are bound to emulate what they see. They should be worthy examples to their children and they should adopt the do as I do policy. What your children will become might be a reflection of who you are as a parent. It is sheer hypocrisy to punish a child for the same offence you nonchalantly commit.

Above all, together as a couple commit the lives of your children into the hands of their Father. Remember, you’re merely a steward of the children put in your care. You’d be held accountable for what becomes of them. It is a joint effort.

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Esho Kemi is a writer, public speaker and a blogger who has the mandate to make a change in her generation. She is the Content Manager at KEMI Writes, a writing agency that caters for all your editing and writing needs. Reach her via email: eshokemi25@gmail.com

6 thoughts on “A JOINT EFFORT”

  1. Nice write up. You really captioned what is typical of many homes today, almost every responsibility including child upbringing is being saddled on the head of the woman. It’s no wonder we hear statements like “he’s your son” when a child misbehaves as if both parties didn’t play a part in the coming to be of the child

    Liked by 1 person

  2. “You’d be held accountable for what becomes of them”. This statement has done justice to the write up.
    Children are the promise/gift of God to the Union between a man and a woman. They are given because there is a ‘Union’ and they are to be taken care of by those united.
    Couples should do the work together and not make it an individual job. Apart from the man leaving the care of the children to the mother, there are some families in which the couples teach the children different principles, that is, while the mother scolds them, the father shields them from her scolding. This also can cause a lot of havoc in the family and lay a bad foundation for the child/children.


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